Here's a perfect example of my problem:
Manipulate[Pause[n], {n, {1, 10}, ContinuousAction -> False}, SynchronousUpdating -> False]
It is illustrated by clicking 10 and then immediately clicking 1, that is, you shouldn't have to wait, it should stop pausing for ten seconds and begin pausing for only one second.
In general, Mathematica does not release a previous computation until the current one is finished. I need to override this in my application, which involves a computationally expensive function for only some values in the slider, and I want the computation to stop and restart when the mouse is dragged.
A Manipulate itself is not necessary for me, perhaps some trickery with Dynamics can achieve this? Also, would your solution work if the function that the slider drives is written with javalink?

Pause[]is interruptible (I mean at user level, without system level call, or CTRL-C type action). But for a general computation, it is easy to add logic to interrupt it. You can have a flag that the computation checks at the end of each iteration, and returns if flag is set. You set the flag by a user button at the top level. – Nasser Oct 15 '12 at 17:17